Do you have an ability, something you are good at?

Do you think others could do it as easily as you, if they just tried harder?

What is missing is the realization that the ability was not due to my greatness, but to God’s gift in designing me that way.

I have a person in my life causing havoc. It triggers me, because if she had been a part of the girls that were used in childhood she would have got at least one of us killed because of her inability to regulate and go numb.

That has made me angry.

I realized today that my ability to be paralyzed on the inside and still do what my perpetrators required externally is not because I could figure out how- it is because God designed me with that ability, to stay alive on the past he chose for me.

A pastor that brought transformation into my my life – by welcoming it into his own-passed away recently.

In his transition he came to stand before me. He asked me to forgive him. I did, not knowing what I was forgiving.

When he was my pastor there was a relational issue that became messy. He felt I handled it the wrong way. Because he thought I should have been able to handle it the way he did.

Now I understand. And today I repent and ask forgiveness from those to whom I have done the same. (If can do it, you can do it- debunked)

My expectations of others came from not realizing that what I do well, I do well because the Lord put it in me to do.

se-lah